Monday, April 9, 2012

You decide who you are.

So I found out today we have to do some major portfolio critique in a couple of weeks. I initially thought it was just for foundations students, and students applying further into the program, but apparently it's not; even if you're just floating along as a junior/senior whatever, you have to get critiqued. Gaaaaah. Luckily it's only stuff from this past semester and this semester.

Still though. Critiques are nerve-wracking, intense, painful, lol. They are so brutally honest with you, it's hard to not direct it back to yourself personally. You really have to separate yourself from your work; but when you put so much time, hours, money, blood, sweat and tears into it, it's hard to NOT be attached to something you do. And when they say it's crap, let it die, forget about it? Ouch.

This semester I was pretty good with design; last semester, ehh, not so much. A few things, there's potential, but package design was just a killer class. I almost want to retake it to redeem myself now that I KNOW what's expected. Plan better, strive more, organize, organize.

I'm just tired; I'm ready for the semester to be done. I can't wait for this summer; warmth, traveling, friends. I'll get to see a beach, I'll get to see things I haven't seen before. And of course conventions with you guys, it'll be awesome.

Never allow someone else to measure out your worth or who you are as a person. No matter what that means: your personality, spirit, vigor, strength, appearance, whatever. Don't attest that to someone else's opinion and then doubt yourself or think they're right. Don't assume that people think so poorly of you or one way of you, they may just surprise you and hold you in higher favor than you hold yourself. However, how we hold ourselves up may reflect on others. If we're confident, strong, motivated and optimistic, people will see us as that. If we're bitter, gloomy, negative, down on ourselves, pitiful, people we'll see that. I'm not really saying this to anyone in particular, if anything, I'm saying it to myself -- I need to work on holding on to my optimism, my strength, I'm encouragement. I don't want to lose myself in the real world, in "growing up". I don't need to think I'm ugly solely because I don't have traits that "he thinks is more attractive", whatever those are.

I need to be me, and love being me, and that will shine on to everyone else.

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