Thursday, February 14, 2013

Need to quit getting my hopes up.

Today ended up turning out pretty crummy.

On top of the school stuff I posted about earlier, work was just... awful. Worse shift ever no doubt. It wasn't really the customers at all, we didn't have any rude ones entirely. We were generally slow. However...

We had about 25-30+ boxes that were delivered from the warehouse. Mind you, these boxes hold maybe... 60-80 movies each, sometimes more if they're thinner cases or video games. We had tonnnnnnns of video games, movies, boxsets, blu-rays, etc... the MOST I have ever seen come in at once. However, they were delivered YESTERDAY AFTERNOON. Our corporate policy is that all boxes are received and at least processed through within a day's time. With big deliveries like this obviously it'll take longer, but it's worked on every day, every shift, as much as possible until it's finished.

The guy that was there when they were delivered -- we'll call him Jim -- was the shift leader. He had the WHOLE evening shift Wednesday night (which is 4-10 PM) as well as the WHOLE morning shift today (9 AM - 4 PM) to work on them. He could have most definitely at least knocked out a few and just started running stuff. we're not expecting them to all get done. But Andrew, the shift leader for today came in at 3 PM and... NOTHING WAS DONE. It'd been a whole day and a half and they hadn't even left the back of the store. When Andrew confronted Jim, apparently Jim just said "I'm paid to be here, I don't care if they tell us to get that stuff out at a certain time I'm not doing that s***" literally. He said this in a prideful, "jesting" way as if Andrew would find it funny, but he didn't; it meant that as Jim got to leave, Andrew and the evening crew (which was me and one other person) would have to get ALL of these received and processed by the end of the shift to get caught up on progress that should have been done already.

It was TONS of work, guys. Seriously. It requires scanning each and every one, opening it and checking the disks to make sure they're there, opening and tagging them with security tags, sorting them out, re-stickering them, removing excess stickers and shrink wrap, re-shrink wrap them, sort them out by category, alphabetize and stock. It was hundreds and hundreds of stuff to go through. We stayed an hour longer than scheduled JUST to finish processing them. We didn't even get to get much stocked. We had to get everything situated neatly because we couldn't stay any longer.

We wrote a letter to the manager complaining about Jim's behavior, we hope something will be fixed.. our manager is just so lackadaisical about employee relations and fixing problems. He's let this behavior go on FOREVER. This is NOT the first time it's happening, it's just the worst it's happened thus far. We didn't get to take breaks at all or even leave. The only way we got to even eat was because Aubrey's mom brought us pizza. And it was really sweet and good, but I just felt gross cause I've eaten nothing but cruddy food all week. Ugh.

I weighed myself and haven't lost any weight since my last weigh-in two weeks ago. I'm feeling frustrated and defeated... it's probably because I'm bloated for monthly reasons, but also because I honestly caved and ate cruddy food and drank soda and tons of coffee cause I was just stressed and tired the past week and a half wanted to quit having self-control and being strong. I wanted that comfort back. Now I regret it of course, that's how it always works. I just wish I could burn off a good amount of weight to keep me motivated to push through...

I just felt fat and ugly today and hated the dreary weather upon leaving work.

On top of that, it's Valentine's Day and I honestly felt a little forgotten. Ethan didn't do anything for me. He didn't even surprise me at work or anything, he stopped talking to me halfway through the day... idk what I expected. One year (I thought it was last) I worked V-Day evening and he showed up at work with flowers and chocolates. I was hoping for that I guess. Almost expecting it. But nope... probably just working on commissions. Idk...  He'd been sweet the past couple of days, pretty attentive too, I'd hoped even though we couldn't actually hang out tonight he'd do something... but instead, it's just been silence and being ignored. He said "we'll just make it up another day" but I honestly don't know how or when that will happen. I'm honestly really bitter with him right now and tired... I just wanted something from him you know? Not a gift or cheesy stuff, maybe just a visit. Is that so hard :/

There's also just a ton of other stuff on my mind weighing me down... I really need to just pray to God to night to get all my frustrations and anxieties out... and get a good night's rest I think...

I'm also emotional and moody cause of time of the month stuff, so sorry if I seem like annoying or whiny or bitter. I'll get over it, I just needed to vent.

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